Anxiety And Pregnancy

Ever since I was about fifteen years of age I developed a sudden panic disorder. For anyone who doesn’t exactly know what this is, it’s very common among teens and young adults. Having a panic disorder is like living in constant fear all day long. I have several attacks a day for no apparent reason. I can honestly say it’s the scariest thing anyone would ever have to go through. You have no control over your own thoughts, feelings and simply just your existence on this very planet. Over these past years, I have also developed another disorder called dedramatisation, This kind of disorder is when I cannot find a balance between reality and dreams. I often have periods of days or weeks where I feel detached from the life that I wish I was living. It’s terrifying. The thing about all of this is that I can not seek medical help. Sure I can talk to someone but these types of things can actually cause depression. Witch can be very serious. Ever since I have fallen pregnant it has gotten worse, because of the simple fact that I am worrying about raising my son. I know in time my problems will get better, but for the time being it’s like living in a horror film that just never ends, the only happiness I seem to find is looking at Bradley’s ultrasounds, that always makes me smile.